The Key to a Successful Long Lasting Relationship: Perspective.

A romantic relationship is the most important aspect of your life. Having a partner to share and enjoy all the beautiful moments of life is what makes life so amazing. While we all want the fairy tale ending, achieving happiness and success in a relationship is not always rainbows and butterflies. All couples run into issues and all relationships take work. If relationships were easy, then everyone would be married, no one would struggle to find the perfect mate and problems in relationships would not exist. Being happy in your relationship is extremely important and resolving issues can be done! We can skip the arguments and days of unhappiness with one simple word, perspective.

How does perspective affect your relationships?

Everything in life is about perspective. When someone is talking to you, you interpret what they are saying based on the way it is making you feel. We can take what someone is saying one way, when perhaps they meant it another. The way I feel about a situation may not necessarily be the same way you would feel about a situation. That’s because we are all different and we all have different perspectives.
Often when we read a text message from our friend, coworker or mate, we interpret it in a way that we think the other person meant it, which may not be correct. And we do not always stop to think about the way they may have intended it to be taken. Could perhaps we have added that tone of sarcasm to those texted words? Have you ever gotten into an argument over the way your partner said something or texted something, and they swear they did not mean it in the way you perceived it? It’s all about perspective! In order to be the best partner you can be, you must always think about perspective. Try to put yourself in the other person’s shoes. Try to understand what they are truly trying to say. Put aside your feelings and ego and think about why they said something, what they must be feeling or going through, and look at the bigger picture!

The key to a successful long lasting relationship; widening your perspective

One day at a party I got to talking to a woman who had been married for 30 years. I asked her what the key was to having such a long successful marriage, she responded, “perspective”. She told me that whenever she gets into an argument or has an issue with her husband she asks herself:

“How much does this really matter in the grand scheme of things? And do I really need to address this issue? ”

She contemplates how important the issue is compared to other things that are happening in her life. She said she also thinks about whether or not she can continue on with her day or week without addressing or making a big deal out of that specific issue. If she still feels like she is upset about the issue, then she widens her perspective even more. She asks herself:

“If my mother were to die tomorrow, would this still matter to me?”

This may seem drastic or make some people feel uncomfortable, but it is a very good point. If you were to lose a very important loved one tomorrow, would this lingering issue still matter to you? When trying to handle a situation with your partner stop and reflect how important the issue really is to you. We must pick and choose our battles.
Looking at life from other people’s perspective will help you to be more understanding and therefore have better relationships. We will still get angry and feel hurt at times, but in the end, if we try to understand how other people are feeling and why they might be acting a certain way, we can empathize with them and avoid unnecessary arguments. This amazing gem of perspective allows you to better deal with the little things in life that bother you and allows you to handle situations in the best way possible.
If you have any questions or comments, we would love to hear from you. Email us at [email protected] and/or register on our site at and comment on our forums!

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